Post by Archivist~Alabaster on Mar 2, 2006 10:43:22 GMT -5
Crying. Running.
Author: Treys
Link: forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.aspx?fn=wow-realm-scarletcrusade&t=161970&p=1&tmp=1#post161970
And she was alone again.
She hadn't been with them long, maybe a month, but she had easily opened up to them, and had become particularly fond of a few of them.
What were you thinking? They were druids, every one of them! How do you think they would've reacted when they found out?! They would have ridiculed you, tormented you, berated you with mocking questions. Just like everyone else. And they would've found out sooner or later. How careless, how foolish. What a mistake that was.
Her entire body was flushed from embarrassment and running as fast and far was her legs would allow. Her eyes were burning from the uncontrollable tears and rubbing.
Always crying. Always running away. Like a child. But you have no home, no mother's arms to run to. You have nothing. So where are you going?
She had been running for what felt like hours, but she'd just gotten off the boat from Rut'theran to Auberdine a few minutes ago. She was able to hold back the tears long enough to fly to Rut'theran, but by the time she landed she was hysterical.
Always ashamed of every little thing. Always afraid to show any emotion. It's not a healthy way to live, being stoic all the time. You're smile is fake. You're laughter is even more unnatural.
"Not always," she mumbled out loud by accident to her self-administered punishment in her mind.
"Not with her."
She doesn't have time for your crap. Let alone you.
"She still cares."
How can she care about someone she knows nothing about? But that's your fault, you don't tell anyone anything. You just put on your act, get all cute and happy. You haven't even told her about..
She cut off her thoughts out loud, "Shut up. She would do the same as everyone else if she knew. And then I really would be alone. Then I really would have no one."
You're already alone. You just lie to yourself. It's out of pity that spends what little free time she has with you, giving you things. She sees how fake your smile is, your laugh. She sees how alone you are.
"She's not broken. She's perfect. She doesn't have anything to hide."
She had been so absorbed in her thoughts she didn't even know where she was going. But her legs did. South maybe? The tears blurred her vision terribly. She needed to get lost. She just needed to cry. She needed to be alone.
She was running faster now, despite the wave of pain that hit her. It always hurt. At least she didn't pass out like usual.
The stares are more painful than this. You were so hysterical that they must think you're parents or lover was killed before your very eyes.
She hadn't seen her parents in years. She had forgotten where they lived. Like anyone could love her. Even if someone had the slightest interest in her, she would just end up running away. She was still crying, but the wind was drying the tears instantly. As much as she wouldn't like to admit it, four legs were always faster than two. This pain was the price to be alone. To always running away. She would be running for a while.
By nightfall she had ended up in Feralas, and somehow managed her way on top of one of the collasals. She was finally alone. She wasn't thinking about how to get down, she was just focused on the moon, while slowly calming the crying, her body shaking a little bit. It was completely silent, save for the breeze, and the sniffles, which persisted because of the amount of phyiscal pain she was in. Her packs had been carelessly tossed around her, herbs spilling all over, one soaked from broken potion bottles. None of these things mattered, they just gave her something to do while traveling alone all the time. The baby faerie dragon she had rescued recently was flapping around excitedly, eager to explore the new rest area.
"I don't get why you insist on following me everywhere," she said wearily to the hatchling, wiping the end of the tears away from her cheeks.
"But I do enjoy the company, even if you don't understand a word I saw, and eat a lot of my food.. You don't care that I'm broken, if you can even understand that. You make me feel important, that someone needs me, even if it's just little ol' you."
The sky was amazing. Not a cloud to be seen. Not a star in sight either. Just the moon. Lying on her side, in a half-fetal position, atop this massive pillar of stone, sleep finally took her. But the sun would be quick to snatch her away when it arrived.
Why am I like this? Why is something so commonplace, so easy for every other druid, next to impossible for me?
The moon held no answers for her.
Tonights sleep would be dreamless, her mind far too exhausted from the day and transformation.
The sleep did her some good, although she still wasn't okay. She was never okay anymore. It appeared as if it would take all day just to get down to the earth below, so she decided to enjoy the morning sun. Walking around the edge, looking for the safest way down, she tried to think about what had occured last nite, but much of it was a blur. Her whole body was aching, not from the running or crying, but from changing. She hated doing that, but her emotions were in control last night. After cleaning up the mess she made, and walking around the edge a few times, so found a way down-she would jump.
This is stupid. This is really stupid.
It was a good ten or fifteen yards away, a decent size lake, but given the height she would be jumping from she could easily clear the gap. The confidence in her decision was quite uncommon.
"Welp, here I go."
Taking one last peek down, she walked to the other edge and spun and bolted for the edge. She jumped.
"Wow." was the only word that managed to escape from her lips as she soared out over the earth below. She was right above the lake, she made it. Now she just hoped it was deep enough.
Now is not the best of times to be admiring the scenery. But than again, you may not get another chance.
Next thing she knew she was underwater. Her toes touched the bottom of the lake, which was rather scary.
"That was a bad idea.." she muttered, pulling herself out of the suprisingly cold water. While wringing out her long silver hair she looked around a bit. She was alone. She was safe. Her clothes and packs were soaked, so being alone was nice. She found a rather secluded part of the lakefront, and began peeling her soaked clothes off her pale lavender skin. It would take a little while for everything to dry out. She may be alone, but she wasn't about to let her guard down.
Where should I go now? I made quite a scene in Moonglade yesterday. And Rut'thern..And Darkshore. No doubt they'll look for me, to try and figure out what happened. For a little while at least. The eastern kingdoms are probably the best choice, I've gotten sick of Kalimdor anyways. Dun Morogh. That'll be the first place I go to when I get there. I miss the snow. But I'm getting ahead of myself, Theramore is quite a walk away..
"I don't have anywhere to go really.."
And with that decided, she lay down for a quick nap. There was no rush, no one waiting for her. Her clothes would be dry in a few hours, and then her long walk would begin.
~~~
"It's been snowing for days.." she said to whomever cared to hear. The blizzard had kept her holed up in the Dwarven city since she had arrived. The griffon even had a hard time gettting through the snow from Menethil. She'd spent the vast duration of her stay at the inn, venturing into the gates to stretch her legs and watch the snow come down. Part of her didn't want it to stop, it was so beautiful. She heard some guards talking about some weird Night Elf girl staring at the snow when she realized how long she had been standing there. The guards were coming in from the storm, their shift was over. She must have been there for hours.
It has to stop snowing soon..right? I mean, it's been going for days, and I'm sick of this city. It's too damn hot. Too crowded. Everyone here is too busy, running here and there..no time to enjoy nature anymore. I need to get out of here.
She wandered out of the gates and toward the small tens and campfire just outside. The snow was coming down softer now, but there was still far too much to travel in. If there was no wind, the snow could almost cover the entrance to the city. She sat on a stool far too small for her, and let the snow begin to cover her.
Where am I going? Nowhere..
What am I doing? What am I looking for? I don't know.
Who am I? I don't even know that anymore.
She knew where she was, but she was lost. She knew who she was, but she was as much a stranger to herself as everyone in this city was. She was alone, and she was utterly borken.
The tears where colder than the snow, but they came too fast for this bitter winter to freeze. She pulled her knees up to her chest and started to rock herself gently on this tiny stool.
"I wish everything was simply a matter of time." she whimpered before burying her face in her knees, her body shaking as she let the tears and sobbing take over.
Author: Treys
Link: forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.aspx?fn=wow-realm-scarletcrusade&t=161970&p=1&tmp=1#post161970
And she was alone again.
She hadn't been with them long, maybe a month, but she had easily opened up to them, and had become particularly fond of a few of them.
What were you thinking? They were druids, every one of them! How do you think they would've reacted when they found out?! They would have ridiculed you, tormented you, berated you with mocking questions. Just like everyone else. And they would've found out sooner or later. How careless, how foolish. What a mistake that was.
Her entire body was flushed from embarrassment and running as fast and far was her legs would allow. Her eyes were burning from the uncontrollable tears and rubbing.
Always crying. Always running away. Like a child. But you have no home, no mother's arms to run to. You have nothing. So where are you going?
She had been running for what felt like hours, but she'd just gotten off the boat from Rut'theran to Auberdine a few minutes ago. She was able to hold back the tears long enough to fly to Rut'theran, but by the time she landed she was hysterical.
Always ashamed of every little thing. Always afraid to show any emotion. It's not a healthy way to live, being stoic all the time. You're smile is fake. You're laughter is even more unnatural.
"Not always," she mumbled out loud by accident to her self-administered punishment in her mind.
"Not with her."
She doesn't have time for your crap. Let alone you.
"She still cares."
How can she care about someone she knows nothing about? But that's your fault, you don't tell anyone anything. You just put on your act, get all cute and happy. You haven't even told her about..
She cut off her thoughts out loud, "Shut up. She would do the same as everyone else if she knew. And then I really would be alone. Then I really would have no one."
You're already alone. You just lie to yourself. It's out of pity that spends what little free time she has with you, giving you things. She sees how fake your smile is, your laugh. She sees how alone you are.
"She's not broken. She's perfect. She doesn't have anything to hide."
She had been so absorbed in her thoughts she didn't even know where she was going. But her legs did. South maybe? The tears blurred her vision terribly. She needed to get lost. She just needed to cry. She needed to be alone.
She was running faster now, despite the wave of pain that hit her. It always hurt. At least she didn't pass out like usual.
The stares are more painful than this. You were so hysterical that they must think you're parents or lover was killed before your very eyes.
She hadn't seen her parents in years. She had forgotten where they lived. Like anyone could love her. Even if someone had the slightest interest in her, she would just end up running away. She was still crying, but the wind was drying the tears instantly. As much as she wouldn't like to admit it, four legs were always faster than two. This pain was the price to be alone. To always running away. She would be running for a while.
By nightfall she had ended up in Feralas, and somehow managed her way on top of one of the collasals. She was finally alone. She wasn't thinking about how to get down, she was just focused on the moon, while slowly calming the crying, her body shaking a little bit. It was completely silent, save for the breeze, and the sniffles, which persisted because of the amount of phyiscal pain she was in. Her packs had been carelessly tossed around her, herbs spilling all over, one soaked from broken potion bottles. None of these things mattered, they just gave her something to do while traveling alone all the time. The baby faerie dragon she had rescued recently was flapping around excitedly, eager to explore the new rest area.
"I don't get why you insist on following me everywhere," she said wearily to the hatchling, wiping the end of the tears away from her cheeks.
"But I do enjoy the company, even if you don't understand a word I saw, and eat a lot of my food.. You don't care that I'm broken, if you can even understand that. You make me feel important, that someone needs me, even if it's just little ol' you."
The sky was amazing. Not a cloud to be seen. Not a star in sight either. Just the moon. Lying on her side, in a half-fetal position, atop this massive pillar of stone, sleep finally took her. But the sun would be quick to snatch her away when it arrived.
Why am I like this? Why is something so commonplace, so easy for every other druid, next to impossible for me?
The moon held no answers for her.
Tonights sleep would be dreamless, her mind far too exhausted from the day and transformation.
The sleep did her some good, although she still wasn't okay. She was never okay anymore. It appeared as if it would take all day just to get down to the earth below, so she decided to enjoy the morning sun. Walking around the edge, looking for the safest way down, she tried to think about what had occured last nite, but much of it was a blur. Her whole body was aching, not from the running or crying, but from changing. She hated doing that, but her emotions were in control last night. After cleaning up the mess she made, and walking around the edge a few times, so found a way down-she would jump.
This is stupid. This is really stupid.
It was a good ten or fifteen yards away, a decent size lake, but given the height she would be jumping from she could easily clear the gap. The confidence in her decision was quite uncommon.
"Welp, here I go."
Taking one last peek down, she walked to the other edge and spun and bolted for the edge. She jumped.
"Wow." was the only word that managed to escape from her lips as she soared out over the earth below. She was right above the lake, she made it. Now she just hoped it was deep enough.
Now is not the best of times to be admiring the scenery. But than again, you may not get another chance.
Next thing she knew she was underwater. Her toes touched the bottom of the lake, which was rather scary.
"That was a bad idea.." she muttered, pulling herself out of the suprisingly cold water. While wringing out her long silver hair she looked around a bit. She was alone. She was safe. Her clothes and packs were soaked, so being alone was nice. She found a rather secluded part of the lakefront, and began peeling her soaked clothes off her pale lavender skin. It would take a little while for everything to dry out. She may be alone, but she wasn't about to let her guard down.
Where should I go now? I made quite a scene in Moonglade yesterday. And Rut'thern..And Darkshore. No doubt they'll look for me, to try and figure out what happened. For a little while at least. The eastern kingdoms are probably the best choice, I've gotten sick of Kalimdor anyways. Dun Morogh. That'll be the first place I go to when I get there. I miss the snow. But I'm getting ahead of myself, Theramore is quite a walk away..
"I don't have anywhere to go really.."
And with that decided, she lay down for a quick nap. There was no rush, no one waiting for her. Her clothes would be dry in a few hours, and then her long walk would begin.
~~~
"It's been snowing for days.." she said to whomever cared to hear. The blizzard had kept her holed up in the Dwarven city since she had arrived. The griffon even had a hard time gettting through the snow from Menethil. She'd spent the vast duration of her stay at the inn, venturing into the gates to stretch her legs and watch the snow come down. Part of her didn't want it to stop, it was so beautiful. She heard some guards talking about some weird Night Elf girl staring at the snow when she realized how long she had been standing there. The guards were coming in from the storm, their shift was over. She must have been there for hours.
It has to stop snowing soon..right? I mean, it's been going for days, and I'm sick of this city. It's too damn hot. Too crowded. Everyone here is too busy, running here and there..no time to enjoy nature anymore. I need to get out of here.
She wandered out of the gates and toward the small tens and campfire just outside. The snow was coming down softer now, but there was still far too much to travel in. If there was no wind, the snow could almost cover the entrance to the city. She sat on a stool far too small for her, and let the snow begin to cover her.
Where am I going? Nowhere..
What am I doing? What am I looking for? I don't know.
Who am I? I don't even know that anymore.
She knew where she was, but she was lost. She knew who she was, but she was as much a stranger to herself as everyone in this city was. She was alone, and she was utterly borken.
The tears where colder than the snow, but they came too fast for this bitter winter to freeze. She pulled her knees up to her chest and started to rock herself gently on this tiny stool.
"I wish everything was simply a matter of time." she whimpered before burying her face in her knees, her body shaking as she let the tears and sobbing take over.