Post by Archivist~Addie on Feb 16, 2006 10:07:54 GMT -5
Author: Panzar
Faction: Horde
Title: Panzar Tells a Tall Tale
Type: Images/Journal
Orig. Published: 2/3/06
[HERE IT IS!!! THE NEXT EXCITING EPISODE OF PANZAR DA INVINCABAL!!!]
Panzar da Invincabal vs. Da Orphans...well not really versus dem or nuttin...
Okay on me spare time when me is not slayin terrible beasties and stuff me likes to go back to where me grew up.
Dis is Naka, she luvs my visits. You see me luv dem poor kids and me has been lucky. Me just likes to give back to da community.
Yup, outta da kindness of me hart me spends some time wit dem poor kids. Me tell dem motivatin' stories about...ME!!
Me told dem about me tankin a Molten Core giant just like me said.
And how me was sooo brave in Alterac Valley and singlehandedly beat back da Allaince.
And how me met dis monster wit my Name!!!
And how me tanked Venoxxis.
Dat tanking is really tirin too.
"Awww, Unca Panzar dat stuff is boring", yelled Naka.
"What do ya mean?" me muttered back all confused. "Me adventures is da bestest!"
Den Lokton said, ...
What the heck did dey tink me was doin! Me was makin up all da good stuff anyhow!
Naka looked at me wit her big eyes and pleaded, "No Unca Panzar, we want a story story. Tell me a story please."
Well you know me. Me can't say no to da ladies.
Once upon a time dere was dis fella dat had a daughter. He met dis lady dat had a daughter too. Well dey figure dey be better off togedda.
"Wait a second, Unca Panzar, how could a Tauren have a Night elf daughter, not to mention an Orc wit a troll daughter?" Naka asked, with a concerned brow.
"Uhh, huh dats da way ma Momma told me. Me never tot about it dat much. Huh? Well, anyway. Da old orc up and croaked one day."
"What did he die from?" asked Naka.
"He uh...got da heebie jeebies and kicked ovah," me answered.
"I never heard of da heebie jeebies. Are you makin dis up, Unca Panzar?"
"You sure are a smart little girlie and smart girlie get a treat if dey shut up for da rest of da story."
"What's da treat?"
"You get to hear da rest of da story!!!!"
.....
"Dat's right. So one of da daughters was bee-ut-iful."
"But she was sad cause she loved her daddy."
Naka brightened up, "Maybe she was like me and was an orphan?"
"Yea dats it, now shush. Da udder daughter was ugly and mean."
"Did they all speak da same language? How did they understand each other?" questioned Naka.
"What?"
"They all speak the same language?"
"Uh cripes...its magic, come on kid, it's a story. Gimme a break okay. So anyhoo da mudder is always mean to da pretty daughter and treats here really badly. Dey live up in Winterspring where's its really cold. She makes da pretty daughter do all da work and never gives her good foods to eat. She makes wear rags...uh...dat show off a lotta skin."
"What't that got to do wit da story, Unca Panzar?" asked little, so friggin clever Naka.
"Well dere has to be sumpin' in it for me too, right sweetie? So dis evil Stepmom, makes her go out into da cold to get....uh...sumting."
"So, being a good girl she does. She is really cold and sad but trys to find some friggin's strawberries, which is stupid cause me would a just gotten a hammer and smashed dat ol' biddy and den..."
"Uhh, could we get back to da story, Unca Panzar?"
"Look me tellin dis story little miss Knows-it-all!!!!" Me yelled. Sheesh wit dis kid already. "Sure so dis girl finds dis cottage and dere are dese two...uhh...magic gnomes. She goes to cottage cause she freezin' cuase she wearin practically nuttin. Now dese crazy gnomes ask people crazy stuff for sum reason."
"Don't mages make food and water, Unca Panzar?" Naka whispered quietly. Me was about to snap and saw she was all ascared of sumting. Den me realized it was me. Me felt like a stinky head.
"Uhh, well yes dey do Naka. You are as smart as you are pretty. Youse see dey wasn't Mages, dey were magic gnomes and dey always do tings...to...um..."
"See if she was nice?" she asked a little more confidently.
"Dats abolutely right!!! Naka, you so smart. You much smarter den me. Whenebber me gets a problem mes gonna aks youse for help. Dey was tryin ta test her. And she was just as nice and kind as youse."
"So even do she was cold and hungry she shared wut little food she had wit da magic gnomes."
"Well dat was da ting to do, cause dey could do magical tings."
"And for da furst time in a long while, sumting nice happened to da lonely girl...cause she was so smart and nice...just like youse, Naka."
"Well you can imagine dat when da good daughter got home and told da udders what had happened, leavin out some key details o' course, dat stinky evil sister wanted to go too!"
"Well her mudder gave her a brand new dress to wear and packed her up a whole bunch of...uh pies. She followed da tracks in da snow and soon spotted da magic gnomes hut. Do you know what dey did?"
Naka's eyes flashed brightly and she smiled, "Dey asked her to share some food too, didn't they""
"Youse is soo smart Naka. So of course, being all stinky and ugly and mean..."
"What do you tink dem gnomes thought about dat Naka?"
"They didn't like that one bit, I bet," she was grinnin now and smilin again and me didn't feel stinky no mo.
"Youse is right again, Naka!"
"Well wouldn't youse know dat a certain very hansum Orcy type was headin dat way."
"Wait a second, Unca Panzar, dat Orc sounds a lot like youse," Naka giggled.
"Ha, so you tink me is hansum huh?" me laughed wit her.
"Well what happened to da nice daughter?"
"So den me...uh dat hansum brave Orcy took dat pretty trollie girl away frum dere."
"Cause me is Panzar da Invincabal, bay-bee, dat's why!"
So me left dem kids dere laughing pretty hard. You know wut? Me think me gonna let Eggbert go play wit sum badages agin.
Faction: Horde
Title: Panzar Tells a Tall Tale
Type: Images/Journal
Orig. Published: 2/3/06
[HERE IT IS!!! THE NEXT EXCITING EPISODE OF PANZAR DA INVINCABAL!!!]
Panzar da Invincabal vs. Da Orphans...well not really versus dem or nuttin...
Okay on me spare time when me is not slayin terrible beasties and stuff me likes to go back to where me grew up.
Dis is Naka, she luvs my visits. You see me luv dem poor kids and me has been lucky. Me just likes to give back to da community.
Yup, outta da kindness of me hart me spends some time wit dem poor kids. Me tell dem motivatin' stories about...ME!!
Me told dem about me tankin a Molten Core giant just like me said.
And how me was sooo brave in Alterac Valley and singlehandedly beat back da Allaince.
And how me met dis monster wit my Name!!!
And how me tanked Venoxxis.
Dat tanking is really tirin too.
"Awww, Unca Panzar dat stuff is boring", yelled Naka.
"What do ya mean?" me muttered back all confused. "Me adventures is da bestest!"
Den Lokton said, ...
What the heck did dey tink me was doin! Me was makin up all da good stuff anyhow!
Naka looked at me wit her big eyes and pleaded, "No Unca Panzar, we want a story story. Tell me a story please."
Well you know me. Me can't say no to da ladies.
Once upon a time dere was dis fella dat had a daughter. He met dis lady dat had a daughter too. Well dey figure dey be better off togedda.
"Wait a second, Unca Panzar, how could a Tauren have a Night elf daughter, not to mention an Orc wit a troll daughter?" Naka asked, with a concerned brow.
"Uhh, huh dats da way ma Momma told me. Me never tot about it dat much. Huh? Well, anyway. Da old orc up and croaked one day."
"What did he die from?" asked Naka.
"He uh...got da heebie jeebies and kicked ovah," me answered.
"I never heard of da heebie jeebies. Are you makin dis up, Unca Panzar?"
"You sure are a smart little girlie and smart girlie get a treat if dey shut up for da rest of da story."
"What's da treat?"
"You get to hear da rest of da story!!!!"
.....
"Dat's right. So one of da daughters was bee-ut-iful."
"But she was sad cause she loved her daddy."
Naka brightened up, "Maybe she was like me and was an orphan?"
"Yea dats it, now shush. Da udder daughter was ugly and mean."
"Did they all speak da same language? How did they understand each other?" questioned Naka.
"What?"
"They all speak the same language?"
"Uh cripes...its magic, come on kid, it's a story. Gimme a break okay. So anyhoo da mudder is always mean to da pretty daughter and treats here really badly. Dey live up in Winterspring where's its really cold. She makes da pretty daughter do all da work and never gives her good foods to eat. She makes wear rags...uh...dat show off a lotta skin."
"What't that got to do wit da story, Unca Panzar?" asked little, so friggin clever Naka.
"Well dere has to be sumpin' in it for me too, right sweetie? So dis evil Stepmom, makes her go out into da cold to get....uh...sumting."
"So, being a good girl she does. She is really cold and sad but trys to find some friggin's strawberries, which is stupid cause me would a just gotten a hammer and smashed dat ol' biddy and den..."
"Uhh, could we get back to da story, Unca Panzar?"
"Look me tellin dis story little miss Knows-it-all!!!!" Me yelled. Sheesh wit dis kid already. "Sure so dis girl finds dis cottage and dere are dese two...uhh...magic gnomes. She goes to cottage cause she freezin' cuase she wearin practically nuttin. Now dese crazy gnomes ask people crazy stuff for sum reason."
"Don't mages make food and water, Unca Panzar?" Naka whispered quietly. Me was about to snap and saw she was all ascared of sumting. Den me realized it was me. Me felt like a stinky head.
"Uhh, well yes dey do Naka. You are as smart as you are pretty. Youse see dey wasn't Mages, dey were magic gnomes and dey always do tings...to...um..."
"See if she was nice?" she asked a little more confidently.
"Dats abolutely right!!! Naka, you so smart. You much smarter den me. Whenebber me gets a problem mes gonna aks youse for help. Dey was tryin ta test her. And she was just as nice and kind as youse."
"So even do she was cold and hungry she shared wut little food she had wit da magic gnomes."
"Well dat was da ting to do, cause dey could do magical tings."
"And for da furst time in a long while, sumting nice happened to da lonely girl...cause she was so smart and nice...just like youse, Naka."
"Well you can imagine dat when da good daughter got home and told da udders what had happened, leavin out some key details o' course, dat stinky evil sister wanted to go too!"
"Well her mudder gave her a brand new dress to wear and packed her up a whole bunch of...uh pies. She followed da tracks in da snow and soon spotted da magic gnomes hut. Do you know what dey did?"
Naka's eyes flashed brightly and she smiled, "Dey asked her to share some food too, didn't they""
"Youse is soo smart Naka. So of course, being all stinky and ugly and mean..."
"What do you tink dem gnomes thought about dat Naka?"
"They didn't like that one bit, I bet," she was grinnin now and smilin again and me didn't feel stinky no mo.
"Youse is right again, Naka!"
"Well wouldn't youse know dat a certain very hansum Orcy type was headin dat way."
"Wait a second, Unca Panzar, dat Orc sounds a lot like youse," Naka giggled.
"Ha, so you tink me is hansum huh?" me laughed wit her.
"Well what happened to da nice daughter?"
"So den me...uh dat hansum brave Orcy took dat pretty trollie girl away frum dere."
"Cause me is Panzar da Invincabal, bay-bee, dat's why!"
So me left dem kids dere laughing pretty hard. You know wut? Me think me gonna let Eggbert go play wit sum badages agin.
